


It's quiet in here

by WolfKomoki



Series: Allenbert fics [2]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Gen, Post Episode: s03e23 Finish Line
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-25
Updated: 2017-05-25
Packaged: 2018-11-04 23:33:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11001309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfKomoki/pseuds/WolfKomoki
Summary: Julian reflects on his life without Barry.





	It's quiet in here

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Cold, Still, Quiet](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10998855) by [wanderer765](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wanderer765/pseuds/wanderer765). 



> The Flash is owned by The CW.

          The precinct is quiet without Allen. The whoosh that comes from his super speed was completely absent as Julian walks into work for the first time without Allen. He doesn’t even know how to explain Barry’s absence, doesn’t want to explain it. He comes up with some bullshit excuse to explain his absence, too emotionally numb to come up with a coherent response. They saved Iris West, and lost three people along the way: Caitlin, HR, and Barry.

          Three people whose absence will never be forgotten. He walks into the lab, and the first thing he sees is the chemical rack. He finds himself missing the sound of Barry’s voice, wishing that he had been smart enough to record it when he had the chance. It’s quiet without the sound of him singing, and Julian misses it deeply. He stares at Barry’s side of the room, expecting him to burst in here any minute before he remembers what happened to him.

          He looks at the last text he ever sent. _Found this cat toy, I thought of you. :)_ Sighing, he opens the music playlist on his phone, playing his favorite songs to fill the silence. The music only made him, miss him more though, and that’s when he decides to shut off the music. He stares at his phone in frustration, wishing that he could talk to him at least. He needs to know that he’s alright, that he’s alive, and he can’t get an answer to either of those questions.

          Allen isn’t dead, he knows he isn’t, but to Julian, he might as well be. He knows that the state of the planet was at stake, that they would all die, but why did it have to be Barry to make that sacrifice? Haven’t they lost enough already?

          He finds himself thumbing through pictures of Barry, wishing with every fiber of his being that he was here, and not trapped in the speed force. Eventually he finds some videos he saved that Barry had sent him where he talked about various things that happened while he was out on Flash duty. As Julian hits play, the videos only make him, miss him even more. The speed force may need a prisoner, but Julian Albert needs Barry Allen. Julian tries to study the cases that were in front of him, but his mind can’t concentrate on anything but Barry.

          How was he doing? Is he okay? Is he safe? Is he hurt? Is he even alive? What’s going on in there? These were only some of the questions running through Julian’s mind.

          It was at this point that Julian wishes that he had Cisco’s powers. Wishes that he could vibe the speed force and at least see Barry if nothing else. The videos he left for him were nothing compared to the real thing. If anything, they were a hollow representation of the hole that had been left in Julian’s life without Barry. _Promise me that you won’t be sad. That you’ll move on. That you’ll live your life._ Barry had asked.

          How can Barry possibly expect Julian to do that? He misses him too much to ever be capable of doing anything like that. Julian doesn’t know how yet, but he’s going to find a way into the speed force, one way or another.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Yep, I'm still heartbroken on that season finale.


End file.
